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Showing Up After an Unplanned Pregnancy and Putting a Baby Up for Adoption

By Carl Roth

If you’re currently pregnant and engaged in the Texas adoption process, you may be wondering about your return to normalcy. Putting your baby up for adoption is challenging, but breaking the news to your peers can also be daunting. Classmates, coworkers, and extended family might be aware that you are pregnant, but not that you’ve chosen adoption. Preparing to navigate these social hurdles can help birth mothers focus more intently on the present and their baby. Then, when the time comes, you’ll know how to respond when inevitably asked about your baby post-placement. Adoption Choices of Texas recognizes the present value of future planning and the stability it affords you. In addition, you may speak with one of our specialists for valuable advice that pertains directly to your situation. Birth mothers’ comfort is a high priority, and addressing post-adoption concerns is an important part of your care. 

If you’re currently evaluating pregnant adoption options, we have adoption agencies in Houston, San Antonio, Dallas, Austin, and throughout the rest of Texas. In addition, there’s never a private adoption center in Texas far from you, so reach out to learn more about your options. With Adoption Choices of Texas, birth mothers are always taken care of, and we’ll help you find the perfect home for your baby. 

If you need help with adoption now, you can call us at 888-307-3340, text us at 888-307-3340, or email us here.

Preparing to Address Post-Pregnancy Questions

Going through the adoption process, you’ve likely begun considering possible post-pregnancy attention. A baby bump always stirs people’s curiosity and anticipation, so it’s hard not to think about what they might say. Many of them won’t know that you’ve chosen adoption and will see fit to congratulate you on becoming a mother. You might be worried about the awkwardness these types of situations could produce and how best to respond. 

It ultimately depends on the person and their particular position in your life’s social structure. For example, someone around you regularly might continue to inquire about your baby if they’re unaware of the adoption. A response that informs and illuminates someone about your situation can be helpful for alleviating some anxiety from your social obligations. Think about who they are, what they should know, and how you’d like them to feel. Most people will be receptive and supportive of your decision when they learn of the path you’ve chosen. 

Family and Friends During the Adoption Process

The people closest to you can be invaluable support for getting through your unplanned pregnancy. Their understanding of your struggle and unique personal traits offers a foundation that is hard to replicate. Who you choose to keep informed about your situation and decisions is your choice. The nature of your existing relationships will determine who you feel comfortable keeping “in the loop” during this sensitive time. You may want their input on various aspects of your adoption plan or just simple assurances of their backing. 

If letting friends in on your adoption plans don’t appeal to you, that isn’t at all unusual. Some birth mothers choose to keep their journey more private, only including the people essential to their baby’s successful placement. It’s important to prepare a response for unaware friends and family in this instance. 

For those in your life that is aware of your pregnancy but not your adoption intentions, you’ll have to reveal your choice to them at some point. The idea can seem awkward, which is why it can help to prepare a way to break the news to them. They may be disappointed in you or upset that they weren’t able to meet your baby. You have a good reason for not including them in your plans, so you don’t owe anyone an apology for keeping them private. Explaining that your situation wasn’t ideal for raising a child is a clarification that almost all can sympathize with. Honesty is the best policy for limiting hurt feelings and damaged relationships. Friends that care about you will understand your course of action and appreciate the personal difficulties you overcame. 

Coworkers or Classmates Post-Adoption Questions

Whether you’re in school, the workplace, or both, hiding your pregnancy is quite challenging and often not a realistic option. There are likely people you regularly see who know or will know of your pregnancy and build up expectations for you. Because you may not feel comfortable making them aware of you giving up your baby, they’ll be curious post-birth. How your baby’s doing, what raising them is like, and common postpartum questions are potential inquiries from uninformed acquaintances. Breaking the news of your baby’s adoption can seem more intimidating because they don’t know you as well. Fear of judgment is also common in these instances, especially in the absence of a significant bond. 

People are more sympathetic to birth mothers than you may realize, especially when you deliver the information personally. If you’re asked about your baby post-adoption by a contemporary, approach the truthful answer as casually or seriously as you feel comfortable with. Once the initial surprise at your adoption decision has faded, they’re likely to see your side of things and move on. Having to inform someone that your baby isn’t their concern is also an option for people you’re not comfortable sharing with. Burning bridges isn’t necessary when choosing a way to address post-birth and adoption questions from classmates/coworkers. Your voice and story will be heard and understood by those around you with any capacity for compassion. Those without it probably aren’t worthy of extra consideration. 

Proceeding with Your Texas Adoption

The future can seem scary and uncertain for birth mothers, but there’s help all around you waiting to lend a hand. Whether it’s your friends and family or an Adoption Choices of Texas counselor, a motivational lift is never out of reach. If you’re concerned about your life after the adoption process, reach out to us for any questions. We want to see you emerge stronger than ever from your journey, so you won’t have to do it alone. With adoption centers in Houston, San Antonio, Dallas, Austin, and other regions of Texas, you’ll never have to look far. There’s bound to be an adoption center near you, and help is just a click away. 

As an expectant woman or birth parent, to learn more about adoption, contact Adoption Choices of Texas. You can call us at 888-307-3340, text us at 888-307-3340, or email us here. If you are hoping to adopt, please visit us here. We look forward to helping you through your adoption journey!

Adoption Choices of Texas es la única agencia de adopción con servicios completamente en esapñol en el estado de Texas. Si está embarazada y necesita ayuda, llámenos o envíenos un mensaje de texto y uno de nuestros especialistas en adopción podrá ayudarlo. Podemos ayudarte con la adopcion de niños. Para obtener más información sobre el proceso de adopción como una mujer embarazada o una madre biológica, comuníquese con Adoption Choices of Texas. Para español llamar: 888-510-5029

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Serving Expectant Parents Statewide
Birth Parent Hotline: 888-307-3340 (Call or Text 24/7)

Adoptive Parents instead, call: 855-304-4673 (HOPE)

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