When you’re facing an unplanned pregnancy, what to do next can be an almost impossible decision to make. If you know that you can’t raise a child at this point in your life, you’re probably left wondering, “Is it better to give my baby up for adoption?” (over other choices).
First, adoption is not giving up. You are making a selfless choice to place your baby with a loving family that you choose!
Ultimately, you are the only one who can make the best choice for you and your baby. No one else can tell you why you should choose adoption for your baby instead of parenting or terminating the pregnancy. No one should pressure you, it is not up to any professional, your friends or family members, or even the baby’s father to force you into choosing. This is a choice that only you can make.
At Adoption Choices of Texas, our adoption specialists will talk to you about all your options, not just adoption. We are not here to talk you into choosing adoption. We don’t believe adoption is “better than” any other option for every woman. But we are here to answer any questions you have about why placing a baby up for adoption is better for some women who choose this path.
Here are some of the most common reasons you might consider adoption instead of other options:
1. You want to give your child a chance at a happy life. This is perhaps one of the most common reasons for adoption. Adoption gives a pregnant woman’s child the chance to grow up with a loving, supportive family and have all of the opportunities she wants them to have.
2. You want to fulfill someone else’s dream of becoming a parent. When a woman is considering her unplanned pregnancy options, it’s common to think of adoption in terms of “giving up.” In fact, many women ask, “Why should I give my baby up for adoption?” But when you “give up” for adoption, you’re not “giving up” anything at all. Instead, you are giving a gift; one that will forever change the lives of another family.
That’s a big reason why “giving up” a baby for adoption is the best choice for many women; when a woman knows that she can’t parent her own child, she may choose adoption to give that priceless gift to someone who desperately dreams of becoming a parent. There are many hopeful parents waiting for a prospective birth mother to choose them, and you can view some of them here. As difficult a decision as it may be, you may choose to change someone’s life forever by letting them raise your baby.
3. You want to feel like you’ve done the right thing. While there is no “right” decision when it comes to your unplanned pregnancy, some women believe that making the sacrifice to carry their baby to term and place them with another family will provide them a sense of purpose during this confusing time in their life. For some women, adoption is a way to feel positive about their unplanned pregnancy, giving them a sense of fulfillment and pride. Remember, however, the only “right” unplanned pregnancy option is the one that is right for you. Adoption is the “better” choice only if you think you will feel better about this choice than you would about any other.
4. You worry that you will regret another decision. Generally, if you have reservations about which choice to make, it may not be the right choice for you. It’s understandable to need time before you can make this momentous decision, but if you think you may eventually regret your choice, that may be a big enough reason for you to decide on another path.
5. You have religious beliefs. If she has strong religious values, those could be a reason why a mother should choose adoption over other options.
6. Adoption gives answers to a birth mother’s “what ifs.” Open adoption gives her the opportunity through which she can see her child grow up and know who they end up being. One of the greatest advantages of adoption is the chance to know your child and watch him or her grow up.
7. Adoption costs nothing to prospective birth mothers. Another reason that pregnant women consider adoption is because it’s the unplanned pregnancy option that’s completely free.
8. Prospective birth mothers can get financial help during their pregnancy and adoption process. There are often other financial benefits of adoption. For women who have fallen on hard financial times during their pregnancy, adoption can provide them additional financial assistance during the time they are pregnant. By placing a child for adoption, you may receive living expenses for things like rent, groceries, gas, and more.
9. You can choose adoption at any point in your pregnancy. Deciding which unplanned pregnancy option is best for you and your baby can be a difficult decision to make, so you don’t want to rush into one before you’re sure it’s right for you. Adoption can be a decision you make at any time in your pregnancy. If you think you need more time to decide whether to parent your child, you might want to consider adoption, as you can place your baby for adoption even after they’re born.
10. You can have continued contact with your baby through open adoption. It may reassure you to know that when you choose to place your child for adoption, you will be able to see them grow up happy and healthy; and even be able to have a relationship with them. Many birth mothers have a special relationship with their baby’s adoptive parents and their baby, and it’s immensely helpful for the emotional healing process after adoption. For many women, this is one of the greatest emotional benefits of adoption.
11. Adoption does not become permanent until signing the legal documents after baby’s birth, so there is time to consider options. One of the reasons why women don’t choose adoption is because they simply know more about other options than adoption. Women aren’t educated about the other options available to them, and they may not have time to consider the facts about adoption. When you decide on adoption, you will always have the chance to change your mind throughout the process, up until you sign your legal consent after your baby’s birth. If you change your mind, that’s always okay.
12. Adoption allows mothers to meet, hold and get to know their babies. You may already feel an emotional connection to your baby, and adoption can be a wrenching decision to make. If you want to make your decision based on how you feel, think about this: when you place your child for adoption, you can meet the baby you give birth to, spend as much time as you’d like in the hospital with them and get to know who they are in anticipation of who they will become.
13. Adoption can be kept confidential if a woman does not want certain people in her life to know. If the reason you’re considering options is because you don’t want people to know about your unplanned pregnancy, it’s important to know that you can certainly have a secret adoption. If necessary, our adoption specialists can help provide the resources needed to help you keep your adoption confidential. Whatever your preferences are for informing others of your pregnancy, our specialists can help.
14. Adoption is still possible if you have a complicated relationship with your baby’s father. It’s not uncommon for pregnant women to make their choice based on they’re concern of the baby ending up with an unsupportive birth father. However, adoption may still be a possibility in this case. We encourage you to call an adoption specialist at 855-304-4673 (HOPE) to discuss your individual situation and options in more detail.
15. Adoption allows you to experience pregnancy. When you choose adoption, you will experience all the highs and lows of pregnancy. For some women, this is an experience they desire to have, especially if they have concerns about their ability to get pregnant again after this pregnancy.
16. When you inquire about adoption, you get accurate, objective information. Unfortunately, when you pursue abortion first, the abortion clinics that you contact may not provide objective and factual information. Because it is such a controversial topic, some professionals and even state legislatures have made it so pregnant women are given certain information before completing pregnancy termination – and not all of this information is factual or unbiased. However, when you contact an adoption professional like Adoption Choices of Texas, we will provide objective information so you can make an educated decision about what’s best for you. We’re not here to convince you why putting a baby up for adoption is “better” than any other choice – we are here to give you the information and support you need to make a decision you feel good about.
17. Choosing adoption gives you 24/7 support through your emotional journey. Choosing adoption can give you the access to trained counselors 24 hours a day. Adoption agencies like Adoption Choices of Texas will make sure you receive the counseling you need as you decide whether adoption is right for you, during the adoption process and even after the adoption is complete – completely for free. You can access this professional counseling 24/7 by calling 855-304-4673 (HOPE).
18. You are in charge of the adoption process every step of the way. Choosing adoption may give you a greater sense of control over your situation. When you choose to place your child for adoption, you will always be the one with the final say when it comes to different aspects of your adoption process. This includes choosing an adoptive family for your baby, deciding what kind of contact you want with them, determining what your hospital stay will be like and more. Many prospective birth mothers enjoy the freedom of choice that adoption offers.
19. You can complete the adoption process from anywhere in Texas. Adoption Choices of Texas works with expectant mothers from all across the state. Whether you live in a big city, a small town or the middle of the countryside, you can reach your adoption specialist whenever you need her and complete the adoption process whenever you’re ready. Aside from your hospital stay and any in-person meetings you schedule with adoption service providers or the adoptive family you choose, most of the adoption process can be completed from your home (or wherever you’re most comfortable).
20. You can start the adoption process right away. No matter where you are in your pregnancy, if you contact Adoption Choices of Texas, an adoption specialist will help you start the process as soon as you are ready. They will take your information, start sending you adoptive family profiles and help you move forward with the process as soon as possible (you always have the chance to change your mind about your decision).
We know that making a decision for your unplanned pregnancy can be difficult, which is why we are happy to offer you the objective, no-obligation information to help you make the right decision for you. Your reasons for adoption instead of abortion (or vice versa) will be determined by your own situation. Whatever decision you make, we can provide you the resources you need to be successful.
If choosing adoption seems like the right answer for you, know that there are many resources available to you for a successful adoption process. Whether you’re sure you want to pursue adoption or you’re still considering why to choose adoption, our adoption specialists can help. Adoption Choices of Texas professionals are always available to discuss your situation for free and with absolutely no obligation for you to choose adoption. Please don’t hesitate to call us today with your questions at 855-304-4673 (HOPE).