Domestic Abuse, Pregnancy, and Adoption
If you or someone you know is in a harmful relationship, it is important to know what your options are in order to make the best decision possible. No matter what the situation, there are people willing to help. In this short dialogue we will cover a few of the steps necessary to formulate a plan, as well as list some of the best resources available. Recognize that regardless of the type of abuse, any form of mistreatment is never okay. Don’t be afraid to reach out to any of the agencies listed below at any time, and know that you are doing the right thing. Not only are you protecting yourself, but your future child as well.
Also understand that adoption is still an option for you. If you are in an abusive situation, we will help get you to a safe, comfortable environment, create an adoption plan – with our with the support of the birth father, and make sure you have a healthy happy pregnancy, and choose an adoptive family for your child.
- Recognize You’re in an Unhealthy Relationship
The first step to getting to help you need is by admitting what kind of situation you are in. To determine whether or not you are in an unhealthy or unsafe relationship, you must ask yourself a few important questions. Remember to answer them as honestly as you can in order to assess the danger posed to you and your future child:
- Does my partner or spouse physically or emotionally hurt me in any way?
- Has my partner or spouse tried to minimize physical or emotional violence?
- Do they blame me or someone else for things out of my control?
- Do they make me afraid for myself or my child’s safety?
- Is my partner or spouse becoming increasingly violent and confrontational?
- Reach out for Help
If you answered yes to any of these questions, know that you have options available to help you. It is, unfortunately, not unheard of for abuse to begin or escalate during pregnancy, so if you are able to remove yourself, call a trusted friend or family member to come get you. Have your healthcare provider’s number on hand, so that you can take to a nurse should anymore abuse or injury occur. Do not be afraid to call 911 whenever necessary.
Knot that you are not alone. We want to help you get to a safe place before anything else happens.
- Make a Plan of Escape
As soon as you can, make a plan for how you will remove yourself from your abusive relationship and go to somewhere safe. Keep track of any police or medical records you can get copies of, as they may be important at a later date. Schedule to meet a trusted friend or family member as a casual event so your abuser doesn’t react or suspect anything is going on. Or, take a walk and call a domestic violence shelter in your area. Let anyone you speak with know the severity of the situation, so they can help you get away safely — day or night.
Be sure that you are ready to leave at a moment’s notice if need be. Put together important items such as your driver’s license, health insurance cards, prescription medications, social security cards, bank information and extra cash if possible. Also, pack essential items such as a change of clothes and toiletries.
- Know it’s NOT Your Fault
Through this entire process, know that this is NOT your fault. You did nothing to deserve this. It is your abuser who is responsible for their action. Nothing condones abuse, regardless of the form it takes.
If you find yourself in an unhealthy, unsafe or abusive relationship, don’t hesitate to reach out! The National Domestic Violence Hotline is available 24/7 and will keep everything you say confidential. Their number, along with other numbers for domestic violence help centers located in Texas are listed below. Again — this is not your fault and you can get help. You can call at any time of day or night to get advice, counseling, or assistance with anything else you might need.
Adoption Choices of Texas: 888-307-3340
National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).
Domestic Abuse, Pregnancy, and Adoption
You are not the first expectant woman to find yourself in this situation, and you won’t be the last. You absolutely have the right and opportunity to reach out to those who love and care for you, as well as specialists who can help you find a safe place to stay. So, do not be afraid to seek help from friends, family, our adoption professionals, or the national hotline. Domestic abuse and pregnancy is a very serious matter, but there are many resources that can help you. You will get through this.
As an expectant woman or birth parent, to learn more about adoption, contact Adoption Choices of Texas. You can call us at 888-307-3340, text us at 888-307-3340, or email us here. If you are hoping to adopt, please visit us here. We look forward to helping you through your adoption journey!
Meet the Author: Elijah Weiner is currently studying English and East Asian Studies at Denison University, and spends the majority of his free time reading a good science fiction book. His interest has always been in fiction, so whether he is reading or writing it is always based upon the imaginary world.
Elijah lives in Boulder, Co and spends his free time reading or bicycling outdoors.